Hello. I’m sorry I’m not available to give you a description of this episode. Please leave a message and I’ll call you (maybe).
Slow dialog: 1:16
Explanations: 5:11
Fast dialog: 21:42
I hate the sound of my own voice. I always have. When I’m speaking to an audience, I always sound forced and unnatural. So when we had to set up our new voice mail system’s outgoing message, it took me a few tries to get it right:
“Hello, you’ve reached Martin Navra at McQ Corp. I’m not available to take your call right now. Please leave a message and I’ll call you back as soon as I can. Thank you for calling.”
No, that wasn’t quite right. I gave it another shot.
“Hello, you’ve reached the voice mail for Martin Navra at McQ Corp. I’m in a meeting or away from my desk. Please leave a message and I’ll call you back as soon as I can. If your call is urgent, please contact Julia Mann at 555-434-3232. Thank you.”
That seemed okay, but since I was leaving on vacation next week, I needed to record a temporary outgoing message as well. This is what I came up with.
“Hello, you’ve reached the voice mail of Martin Navra at McQ Corp. I will be on vacation from March 3rd through March 10th. If you need to reach someone immediately, please call Julia Mann at 555-434-3232, or dial “0” to reach reception. Otherwise, please leave a message and I’ll return your call when I return. Thank you.”
I was finally done. The good thing is, whenever I call to retrieve my voice mail messages, I can bypass my outgoing message. With any luck, I’ll never have to hear my own voice again – ever!

Script by Dr. Lucy Tse